Monthly Archives: February 2010

Update on 2/28/10

The Moviepoet logline contest results will be posted tomorrow.  There are 107 entries and the top 30 will advance to the next round.   This is the logline for “The Screenplay” that I’ve been writing the past couple of months.   I’m nervous because I really want to move on to the next round.   This contest is such a wonderful opportunity to obtain valuable insight into a finished screenplay.   I want this so bad I can taste it.  I know, a really bad cliche.  But, I don’t care.  That’s how I feel.  If I don’t move on I just hope I’m not too disappointed.

I watched the finished film “Churhi” for the first time today.  I am deeply impressed and hope everyone will get a chance to view it at DVXUser.  I will post the link as soon as I have it.  I am very grateful to have been a writer on this project.  The filmmaker is Ubaid Seth.  I suspect we will continue to see many great things from him in the future.

As far as Bart Vader goes.  The filmmaker, Margaret Ricke, has reported that she will film this during her one month Florida vacation.  Keep your eyes posted for more updates!

Dreams…

I work full-time.  I’m a mom and a wife and I’ve got all the stuff to do that goes with those things.  Plus, I’ve got this dream of writing a succesful feature. 

To go for the dream, I’ve got to get out of bed at 4:00 in the morning.  I suppose I could write at night but I’m always too tired at night…

So, every morning this damn alarm blares in my ear.  And I slap the snooze.  Usually I get out of bed but sometimes I don’t because it’s too easy to stay wrapped in my warm blanket cocoon.  It’s tempting to keep my eyes closed and urge my brain to go “finish that dream”.

But, there are dreams and there are dreams.  And, if I don’t get out of bed, I will never achieve the dream I have to write a successful feature.  So, I get out of bed.

And I wrap myself in the cocoon warmth of my fleece robe.   And I get a cup of coffee and sit  at my computer and write…  It’s 4:00 a.m. and I’m close to my “dream state” but I’m not dreaming, I’m wide awake and chasing my dream!

Screenplays and Social Statements

I’ve written a half-dozen screenplays now, and all of them need a rewrite.  At this point, I think only two of them have a chance in hell of ever being made into a movie.   Why? 

The two that I think have potential  are stories that obsessed me, stories that seemed to flow out of my heart and scream to be typed into my computer.  They are also stories that make a strong social statement.

Why did I write the others?  Different reasons.   One time I challenged myself to write a script that took place in one location.  Thought it would be easy to sell.  But I couldn’t wrap my heart around the story and because of that the story feels flat.   Doubt it’ll ever be made.  In fact, I doubt I’ll ever get around to doing another draft.  I don’t believe in the project anymore.

For me, it is much easier to write a SP if I believe in the story.  For me, the story must do more than entertain.  It must have a message and I think my  future feature projects will  contain a social message.  It’s where I’m leaning.

Most stories have messages, lessons to be learned, statements to make.  But,  my statement will be bigger than “don’t forget to lock the doors or the boogy man will get you”.  For me, it’s got to be there or I can’t immerse myself in the project, can’t believe in it enough to devote so much of my life to it.

The trick will be to make a social statement WHILE creating an entertaining script.  Now, that’s the challenge!  And I accept the challenge with all my heart! 

I think  “The Screenplay”,  my current project,  is that.  It’s a thriller with a huge social statement.   And that’s all I can tell you right now!

Actor Bait!

One of my favorite screenwriting book is “Your Screenplay Sucks!” by William M. Akers.  In fact, I’m currently reading it for the third time.  Everytime I read pages 2-3, I think to myself:  “this is SO true”. 

On page 2-3 Aker talks about writing “actor bait”.

Sure a screenplay has to have a great plot, with twists and turns that keep readers on the edge of their chair.   But, more than that, it’s got to have characters who will attract good actors!   Those characters must entice the actors to give up months, maybe years, of their life to be involved with your script.

As you write your script, ask yourself if  the characters are complex?  Do the characters have layers that  actors can use to turn their role into an Academy Award?   Does the character have interesting habits?   Is the character unique?

Producers and directors don’t want to make a film that will not attract top talent.    Every character in your screenplay should be written with this in mind.    Give the character life on the page and the actor will breath life into it on the silver screen!

Write more than a screenplay…  Write “actor bait!”

The First Ten Pages of a Screenplay

I’ve written the logline, come up with a title, and I’m almost done with the first draft of “The Screenplay”.  I’ll take a short break and then reread and start to rewrite.  The first thing I’ll do on the rewrite, is pay attention to the first ten pages.  Real close attention.

Why?  Because the first ten pages are the most important. 

Why?  Basically because if I can’t hold a reader’s attention for ten pages, that reader is going to stop reading my screenplay.  I don’t care how good the middle is, how extraordinary the ending is, if the first ten pages don’t grab the reader, the reader won’t get to the middle, much less the end.

So, what needs to be in my first ten pages?  First, let me tell you what should NOT be there.  I better not  have any mispelled words or punctuation problems.  And I must make sure the first ten pages show the reader that I can write!   I don’t want to distract the reader by using “their” when I should have used “there.”  I don’t want to use “it’s” when it should be “its.” 

And I definitely do not want to fill up the first ten pages with exposition and useless scenes.  I need to introduce  drama, and I must do it right away!   I don’t want to tell you a story, I want to show a story…  

Another thing worth mentioning is this,  I won’t use shock to get the reader’s attention.  What do I mean?    I won’t use obscenities or sex or violence, just for the sole purpose of getting a reader’s attention.  If I can’t get a reader’s attention with characters and motivation, then I’ll consider cutting the scene.

Okay, enough about what should not be in my first ten pages.  What should be there?

First and foremost, the first ten pages of a screenplay should look like a screenplay.  Not a poem.  Not a novel.  Not an essay.    It should be written in the proper screenplay format.  I’ve learned how to do this by reading other screenplays and reading books about screenwriting. 

Now the meat…

I want to make sure something happens in the first ten pages!    While I introduce the characters, I must make sure I “hook” the reader.  And I do this with conflict. 

When I introduce a character I want to ”show” the character.  I wouldn’t want to tell you  that a main character is a fireman, I would want to show him fighting fire!  Many things can be used to show character.   Consider showing a character’s closet or the bumper-stickers on their car.  Show us that they love to eat cold spaghetti for breakfast.  Show, show, show!

The sooner I show conflict in my story, the better.   Remember, I’ve got to keep the reader turning those pages.    But before I do that, I need to make sure I show ”life before the conflict”.   I need to let the reader know when the story takes place and where, and what life’s like before the conflict hits!  All this happens in the first ten pages.

I’ll try to not start at the beginning.  It’s better if I can start in the middle of something.   I must remember that I’m not writing a novel so I don’t have time for a lot of background detail.  Drama, drama, drama!

If I need more time to set up the drama (sometimes this is needed in a thriller), I want to make sure my characters are interesting enough to make the reader care about them.  And I want to make sure the reader knows something is going to happen, right around the corner.

I’ve read a lot of articles about what needs to be in the first ten pages.   Basically it amounts to this, I MUST HOOK THE READER so the reader will want to get to my very extraordinary end!

The first ten pages.  Gotta be good.  Gotta be better than good.  Gotta be great…